Hello there and welcome to the second installment of Room For Squares. In this column, I’ll be screeching in Asperger-esque fashion regarding the merits and demerits of various expensive G-SHOCKs, with particular attention being paid to those timepieces which claim direct descent from the 1983 “square” DW5000-C.
Welcome to Room For Squares, home to the G-SHOCK faithful. I’m your guide, Jack Baruth. Please turn your hymnals to page DW5000-C so that we can pray to Saint Kikuo Ibe, inventor of the “Triple 10” concept, the man who brought us The Original Square. But first, for those of you who are new to The Church of The Square, rest assured that ours is not a violent or exclusionary faith . . .
I’m no outdoorsman, but I know a guy. My guy says hydration is the key to outdoor survival. Not freezing to death is also a thing. After that, it’s all about getting someone to rescue you, or finding your own damn way to safety. A cell or sat phone works for the former. A watch with GPS location tracking for the latter. Great. But why do so many of these things have to be so ugly? Big and ugly . . .